When facing the prospect of divorce, it is critical to choose the right process to efficiently resolve your open marital disputes, craft an enforceable agreement that meets Connecticut's statutory requirements (known as a Divorce Agreement, Divorce Decree, or Separation Agreement), and complete formal process/procedure required by the Connecticut Superior Court Family Division -- so that your divorce agreement is properly filed with court, certified by the court/family law judge, and entered as a final and valid divorce order.
The complexity and size of your marital property, the relationship and trust level that you have and can maintain during the process with your soon to be ex-spouse, the length of of your marriage, the needs and best interest of your children, and the stability and/or alignment of your parenting views and expectations with your co-parent are some of the most important factors in determining that Mediation is right for you and is able to deliver on its "promise."
On the surface, the most common considerations on which people initially focus include: maintaining privacy, controlling the costs, and minimizing the incredible stress of the process. In this context, "Are you going to Mediate?" has evolved as the default reaction and "Go To Question" confronting people facing Divorce -- therefore representing the so-called amicable path and positive solution.
By contrast, the perceived opposite of Mediation is the so-called conventional "Divorce" -- where the idea of "hiring a good Divorce Lawyer" seems to be associated with maximum conflict, costly litigation, and the next "War of the Roses."
Both of these perceptions are superficial stereotypes deeply rooted in pop culture. They reflect a very shallow understanding what Mediation "is" and "isn't"; un-informed ideas of how the Mediation process works, and whether your individual interests are reasonably "protected" by the process; and "if" the specific, tangible benefits offered by Mediation are reasonable to expect given your unique situation. As with most things, “the devil is always in the details.”
The truth is that every case is not a good candidate for Mediation, there are a great many technical nuances and protections (legal and statutory) that should be considered before committing to a path of Divorce Mediation in Connecticut. It should also be noted that there are a wide variety of Divorce Mediation models available to you...it's not a "one-size-fits-all" thing and it is nuanced. It is also important to note in answering this question that most Divorce and Family Law Attorneys are well equipped and make every attempt to (first) work through issues amicably and craft divorce agreements with an informed, negotiation between both parties without litigation. So therefore, the negative stereotypes: Mediation is good AND Divorce Attorney is bad are both ill-deserved and quite often inaccurate.
The basic difference (Mediation vs. Divorce) is that in a Mediation the spouses engage a third party to help them work through their issues. That third party does not represent either spouses individual, best interests. A Mediator's prime directive/obligation is to bring both parties to settlement -- which, in the context of Divorce Mediation can come at the expense of the individual best interests of one or both of the parties. In a conventional divorce, both parties engage lawyers who are responsible for protecting the individual, best interest of their respective client.
A closer look at Mediation reveals important risk factors to Mediation participants that should be fully considered and clearly understood versus the protections and benefits that a conventional divorce offers when individually represented by n experienced divorce lawyer. See Advantages/Disadvantages of Mediation before foregoing a traditional path for divorce (that starts with the Filing of a Divorce Complaint in the Connecticut Superior Court Family Division) or a hybrid litigation/mediation divorce process. See Divorce Mediation FAQs